Congratulations to John Katsaros! He's won a trip for two to see Justin Timberlake LIVE at Madison Square Garden in New York City!

A guy is sitting on his sofa when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can. Three years later, there's a knock at the door again. He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says, "What the hell was that all about?&qu...

The cable repairman was on my street and asked me what time it was. I told him it is between 8 am and 1 pm.

Took my first shot today! So excited, and my next one is in 2 weeks. It was a hard choice with so many options. I chose the tequila one.

A boy read a restaurant sign that advertised fat-free French fries. "Sounds great," said the health-conscious boy. So he ordered some. He watched as the cook pulled a basket of fries from the fryer. The potatoes were dripping with oil when the cook put them into the container. "Wait a minute," the b...

A teenager brings her new boyfriend home to meet her parents. They're appalled by the boy's behavior and attitude. After he leaves, the girl's mom says, "Dear, he doesn't seem to be a very nice boy." "Oh please, mom," says the daughter. "If he wasn't nice, would he be doing 500 hours of comm...

I was really embarrassed when my wife caught me playing with my son's train set by myself. In a moment of panic, I threw a bedsheet over it. I think I managed to cover my tracks.

It was my wedding day, and no one was happier than my 78-year-old mother. But as she approached the church doors, an usher asked, "Which side are you on?" "Oh, no," she said. "Are they fighting already?"

I've always been confused between the definition of right and wrong. When I was a kid my parents would say, "Boy, you have done wrong." I'd say, "Is that right?" They would say, "Yes."

A little boy said to his friend "This morning my dad mixed up the boxes gave me soap flakes instead of corn flakes for breakfast" His friend said "l bet you were mad." "Mad?" say's the boy "I was foaming at the mouth!"